To (Personal) Ad or not to (Personal) Ad?

Part of this New Year kicking-off experiment has got me wondering if I should place an ad to attract my asexual honey. I always come at it from the optimistic angle, thinking that I have plenty of options. Then I remember that I'm asexual and don't have many options at all.

I may be asexual, but I'm still like a lot of people in that I love to be in love. I love the butterflies-in-your-stomach feeling, the giddiness that comes from being around the object of your affection, the stupid things you find yourself doing to impress the person you like. I like finding out I disagree with my crush about something, then discovering that I love them enough to overcome our differences. It's too bad, then, that this usually happens to me with gay men and straight women. Or, occasionally, with straight men or gay women who then want more than I feel comfortable giving them.

This is the difficulty of it, I think, and this is right about when I start to get down about the whole thing (see New Year's Resolution re: being negative). I start thinking it would be so much easier if I was like other asexuals who don't want to date or be in relationships. I have friends; it would be nice if all I wanted out of life was to continue having them and have nothing change between us. Or I think about how much easlier it would be if I was, well, less of an asexual and more of a sexual person, because then there would be no explaining necessary. No pre-date warning required, and no need to assure my date that my lack of interest in sex has nothing to do with how attractive I find him or her. It's not being asexual I mind, but did I have to be an in-betweener, too? I feel like I'm a subset of a subset of a subset.

What does an asexual put in his or her personal ad, anyway? There are a couple of asexual personal sites out there already, but there aren't very many of us to begin with. I'm a bit concerned about the incestuous possibilities of everyone in the asexual community dating one another, to tell you the truth. You'd always be running into someone who'd held hands with or stood very close to someone else... tensions and jealousy would run wild. Very messy.

Obviously this will have to be a two-parter while I contemplate my option. No 's'.